“It’s no big deal!”

Man…I stress over everything. I’m sitting here dealing with the anxiety of my first shift back on placement after a 3 month stint in lectures. In this situation it’s apparently called Performance Anxiety aka Stage Fright. Fear of performance, in front of my mentoring midwife, other staff and the women, having to complete assessments….it all gets a bit much for me. I’m systematically going through each remedy I know of, in relief. I think of focus. Identifying each worrying thought in my mind by maybe writing it down….I think ‘blog!’ I then start to stress about the fact that I’ve not written my first published blog as yet, and then I start to stress whether I can remember the password to this site, and I stress about whether I have the time (shift starts in less than three hours) as there’s still a shower to have & dinner to eat and a Skype call from my academic mentor making sure I’m not stressing!…..ENOUGH ALREADY!
The noise in my head is overwhelming at times. But today ITS NO BIG DEAL, if I don’t sleep before hand, if I don’t manage to eat first, if someone has anything to say about this blog (I’ll still get LilSis to proof read it!) and if I can’t find my favourite compression socks and I’m late for my shift?….it’s no big deal. I will have ticked off getting this blog site up and running, off of my ‘To Do List’, reduced my anxiety and stress and I’m going to do the job I’ve always wanted to do! I get to catch babies!! I get to be a part of someone’s life changing experience of bringing an important little person into the world. It’s not about me and my performance. It’s not always this simple but for today…..Go Away anxiety. You are no big deal.


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